Conversations Across the Table

by Emma Wauchope  

So, you want to do surgery, that’s great, good for you.

The world is your oyster, you can do anything you choose to do With that confidence in your heart and the fire in your eyes. Have you sought some advice from those already on the rise?

What are your aspirations, which specialities have you thought through?

I’m doing ENT, so my fiancé can have a career in ortho too.

I picked something supportive for when I want to have a baby, Urology’s a good choice, so you can be there when he can’t be.

Maybe not orthopaedics, you didn’t do rugby, right? Oh, you went to a private school, then you’ll be alright. Are you as strong as an ox and as smart as one too?

For this boy’s club you’ll need to do more than just hammer and screw.

How about General, they seem all-inclusive?

If you want to wield a knife, they’re not racially exclusive.

Post-covid they’re not too concerned with trying to save the old, The waitlists are too long to fix them all, so I’ve been told

You’re considering Plastics, that would be fun to pursue, Head to Liverpool for aesthetics, there’s plenty to do.

There’s great money in private work, you can name your terms,

Oh, you want the skills to take home, to debride women with chemical burns?

Don’t complain about the heat in theatre until you reach my age, Try having a hot flush in these gowns and keeping your mind engaged!

Boss, do you think we’ll run late? Oh no I’m happy to stay, The sitter will put my baby to bed whilst we beaver away.

Don’t worry about the NHS, Sewell said we were fine,

We have pregnant women who can operate, see here’s one in a picture online.

Homophobia is fixed with a rainbow badge so people can’t make jokes about being queer. Consultants got a pay rise and politicians branded the rest heroes at the Thursday cheer.

This is the new normal now, I’m sure you will notice the difference. Being an F2 in a pandemic you must have learnt some resilience?

It was great how you paused your portfolio to help us fight off the virus, But now that we’re past that, you’ll need to do more than ever to inspire us